The Valdez family lives across the street from us, next door to Obi-Wan. Juan and his wife Miranda are a few years younger than my wife and I. They married right after high school graduation. Juan began working construction type work when he was a teenager and is now a licensed contractor for concrete and construction and runs his own business with about 6-10 steady employees. Miranda was a full-time mom raising 3 kids and running errands for the construction business. When their youngest entered school Miranda began classes at a local university to become a Spanish teacher. They are very dedicated to their catholic church - one that I've had secret agent dealings with and have a huge respect for.
They've always invited us to backyard BBQs and their kids' birthday parties...which I now plan my whole existence around. Really...I'm marking my calendar for the next Valdez kid birthday party because, come hell or high water, I'm going to be there. They are a blast. I'm a white guy who grew up in a very small family and when we did any kind of party they sucked at best. Cake, some presents, a little conversation...whoopee. But I'm usually introverted so what did I care. My wife, the social monkey extrovert, is bi-racial and bi-cultural. She is a Canadian with a Jamacian mother. She's related to half of Saskatchewan and all of Jamaica. Her family reunions are usually a church related deal and these can be fairly fun. But I now know that you haven't lived until you attend a Hispanic kid's birthday party in Texas.
Loud music from a cheap stereo with spanish and 80's rock tunes, huge-ass jumpy-castle-type water slide, food galore, relatives galore, kids screaming and going nuts (in a good way), half-drunk Uncles jumping down the waterslide with exposed beer guts, catholic church friends galore, pin'ata slaughter galore, cake all over the place, spanish singing galore, and Mexican beer....galore. I'm already trying to gather ideas for my offspring's first birthday this October. But if I tried to even halfway recreate this experience it would come across as a white guy trying too hard. Money can't buy this kind of fun. Well actually...for the measly price of an $8 Barbie doll or a $5 hot wheels set in wrapping paper you get:
1) unlimited burgers and chips
2) unlimited beer
3) more visual entertainment than you can imagine.
That's far better than anything a night club has to offer. And besides, it's for a good cause: a kid is turning 9.
The youngest girl, Maria, had her party in May. Junior had his last weekend. So I ask the oldest girl, Harley, when her party will be.
"My birthday is in April. I'm not going to have a party. I'm going to the mall."
"So how am I supposed to get a burger and a beer? This is all about me, you know."
Lord, I wish the Valdez's had more kids.
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4 comments:
indeed. as you know cali has a large hispanic population. my hispanic neighbor (Louis) has the biggest parties (when he does)
saskatchewan eh? i lived in Canada for 2 years - 3 years ago.. wait.. yeah. i was in Calgary. i served at a bible school there. i drove many (too many) times through friendly manitoba and saskatchewan. i know a few folks up there. i got the impression that everyone in canada was related to or knew everyone else.
loved it there.
Yes...I know more about Canada than any room full of Texans. And I know more 'aboot' Canadian geography than any Canadian, or so I like to think. I'm pretty sure Canada is a bunch of inbreds. At least some of their churches are.
I'm honored you read this. I think you're the only one.
Fletch, do you read the comments? Something to ponder... If someone finds out I am from Canada, they say, hey, do you know John in Ottawa? But if they thought I was from Texas, they would never say, do you know Mike from Dallas???
And Agent b, I take offence, you know I read your files ;) or do super, agent wives count? Watch how you answer, you know we have a dog house and that agent dog doesn't use it!! ha
Agent B
Holy Cow! Your blog borders on the funniest thing I have ever read. Thank you for sharing and be sure and invite us to the next party as well. :)
Jenni
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