Gone fishing #003 (bait-n-switch)

Still trying to make sense of it all.

Still fighting depression. Fighting fairly well, but it's an uphill battle or so it seems.

Still refusing to believe that the miracles in the last 2-3 years in my life is a lead-up into all dreams of mine being disolved. Thus...

Still expecting something big. However...

Still trying to find moderate income as we're broke. Somehow. Somewhere.

Now for: "Fun with Pimping*: Looking for work in all the wrong places"

1) The organization that I applied with mentioned here is a no go, as far as I'm concerned.

I've been vague about them until now. But I'll just say, they are the largest non-prof ministry to the poor in the entire world, have a 140 year history, their founders are 2 of my personal heroes, their goofy military schtick is actually effective...even though I can't hold back from laughing when I see their leaders in public all decked out in uniform, and...last but not least...I have NEVER heard a positive word about the local branch of this organization from the mouths of the homeless.

Never.

None the less, I'm desperate so I applied since I was told by an inside source that I was well qualified for the position of "case worker". And I specifically asked if a social work degree was needed for this job, since they usually expect that for any case worker. I was told no, the degree was not needed. Street smarts and experience trumped a social work degree.

So I applied.

And I waded through their unprofessional nonsense mentioned here.

And when the interview finally happened monday morning...BAIT-N-SWITCH, baby!

THE GENERAL: "Well a social work degree IS needed for this position. But we have something that would fit you just fine!"

Read: something much lower paying, more dirty work, and crappy hours. They might need someone to operate their homeless shelter hours. Might.

I haven't heard back if that position is surely open. But bait-n-switch is one of my biggest red flags in life. If they weren't honest with me at first, why should I trust them to be my employer.

2) Meanwhile, I've been applying and pimping all over the place:

-a state job as a clerk in the human resources office of a prison (I might get killed during a riot, but I'll be paid well in the process)
-a Denver based company that outsources human services for the government (don't know exactly what the hell that is, but sounds like good pimping to me)
-a sales rep for the phone/internet company I use at home (maybe there's employee discounts)
-plus potential handy-man and odd job gigs (which I love, but have little experience)
-and...whatever else may float my way...

But, we're damn near broke and a few bills due on the horizon. The CEO has delivered many times before.

I still dream of The Table daily. Especially the live music aspect of it, as I've suddenly found myself a former musician who hasn't played any good gigs in over 3 years. That really hurts my soul...

And sometimes I feel that I'm wrestling with idealism versus realism. Or maybe it's faith versus faithlessness. Or intellegence versus nonsense. Maybe it's none of these at all.

Dear CEO: What gives? What exactly is the path you are taking me down? How does this lead me to my hopes and dreams? I still trust and worship you. I just request relief and joy in my life now. Thank you.

*a slight nod to agent G13