Wednesday, September 19, 2007

pruning boy #011: pathetic and humbling

*As always, Agent B is pondering his existence and contemplating the meaning of life as viewed through a part-time employee of a small tree service company...

Admittedly, I have a real love/hate outlook on my job with Son and Dad Tree Service, Inc.

I LOVE - that it gives me much free time to do agent work (sometimes – TOO much free time). I HATE - that the pay barely covers my monthly mortgage.

I LOVE - the physical workout. I HATE that I feel beat for the rest of the evening.

I LOVE - that feeling of accomplishing a large job that seems impossible up front. And I LOVE the idea that in reality, I am a professional lumberjack, all manly and so-forth.

But I HATE - that The Son, The Dad, and I are the absolutely most inefficient work crew on the freaking planet. And there's not a damn thing I can do about it.

Seriously. I mean it’s two old men and me. Guess who takes on the majority of the work load?

The Son, proud owner and proprietor of Son and Dad Tree Service, Inc., has bad knees and acts like a cripple sometimes. And we’re supposed to take trees down for crying out loud. So he spends most of his time barking out commands at me - and talking on his phone.

The Dad, nearly 90-years old and working “for something to do”, is more of a company mascot than a real worker. He started this gig almost 50 years ago and many of our longtime customers know him well. The Dad can’t do much in the labor department, but I respect The Son’s decision to have him work since it gives him something to look forward to everyday. But realistically, The Dad slows us down big time. So it goes.

Once we were hired to take down two huge pine trees. But one of them was too risky for us with our lack of cranes and etc. as it was next to a house. So The Son subcontracted that tree to another local tree service company that had the tree down in like 20 minutes. I was jealous. They sent out these two young guys with two powered cranes and pro gear, wearing facial shields and etc.

My only eye protection is my sunglasses. My boss is too cheap to supply face shields.

I like my job OK. I’m not ashamed to be in my upper 30's with a college degree and working with chainsaws for small pay.

But we are the most pathetically embarrassing work team. Ever.


Leanne said...

I hear ya, B.

ericaprosser said...

I know this wasn't supposed to be funny, B, but you told it in such a funny way. You are a saint for sticking it out.

Agent B said...

Oh Erica, this WAS suppose to be funny.

My life is total comedy these days.

ericaprosser said...

I'll take comedy over tragedy any day.

JesusFreak said...

Aaaahhh, chainsaw envy. Very common among men.