Sunday, April 27, 2008

coming (partially) out of hiding

As mentioned dozens of times before, my real-life musician identity has made itself re-known. I am playing more and more gigs whenever possible. I am still slowly crawling out from my rock of obscurity and into the lime-light of sorts.

In addition to the standard artwalk gig and cameo appearances at open mic nights, I recently played two high profile performances. One was at a local music festival. Another was a fundraiser for a local chapter of the Loyal Order of Water Buffaloes. It was their annual waffle supper or something. This could have been the pinnacle Spinal Tap moment of my musical life. It was goofy, but it turned out OK.

Also, outside of the music sphere, I recently joined various online social mechanisms such as an alumni website for Houston-area high school graduates as well as the Facebook cult. I use to avoid these things like the plague. And that was due to my wanting to get away from the past and embrace the agent calling. Which was partially due to my not wanting or knowing how to explain my current existence to old acquaintances.

But I finally accepted and embraced this wandering through the desert era. I’m no longer afraid to announce “I have a college degree and I mow yards and use chainsaws for a living”.

My evil middle-class mind wants to get into wars with potential questioners of my life with things like, “Hey, you’re probably $50K in the hole just to maintain your fa├žade of a life. I may have less than $5K in assets, but at least they’re MINE”. Thankfully, I have repressed my middle-class inner child. I have drank him away into oblivion and he doesn’t exist anymore. As far as you know.

But on more than one occasion, a friend or two have asked me about my current day dealings in person. So I was upfront and honest with them, even sharing the part about the agent schtick since they knew of my past as a minister to the poor through a benevolent ministry.

And more than once, they give me that “disappointed parent” look. That “you could be doing better” look.

I hate that look.


*photo credit here.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I've hated that look all my life. Verbny

mike said...

hey now, i have a couple of degrees as well as 1/5th of a masters and am smarter than most people I know yet I swing a hammer all day.

'taint nothing wrong with manual labor. somebody has to do that shit right?

middle class climbers can lick my left ball.

Agent B said...

100% with ya Mike. Nothing wrong w/ manual labor.

But amazingly...christians in our western culture look upon us as if we've failed life somehow. What does that really say? Christians are supposed to have comfortable lives and be rich, etc? Sheesh...

Last week I actually had an old acquaintance warn me about manual labor. Something like how he almost sliced his finger off with a table saw and it changed his life. How he could have lost his whole livelihood along with his finger. So he went into desk-jockey work.

Fear...what a great motivator. Who needs faith.

jamie said...

Yes, that is a terrible look.

Anonymous said...

the pancake dinner, if that was you wow, that is a cool g-tar

Vaughn

mike said...

unless your bud was a surgeon or a guitar player or a stenographer i am not sure how loosing a finger is a career ender.

i know so many guys in the trades with lost fingers it is almost funny.

besides, isn't loosing a finger the first step towards becoming a shop teacher?

i think it is fear - fear of hard work. fear of not being able to think of one-self as better than "those people."

i don't know if it is a christian thing or just a western middle class thing.

well, fuck the middle class. we will eat them during the revolution. pfft.

plus, aside from the occasional snobby social climbing - uh, woman - most chicks i meet dig it that i am in construction. the hard muscles, the tan, the rugged thing. besides, you know what they say, if they don't find you hansom they better find you handy.

Agent B said...

I might know what you're talking about, Vaughn. I might.

Agent B said...

Yeah Mike. Fear. That's it.

And yeah, it's probably a middle-class/western thing. Not necessarily a christian thing.

[rhymes with kerouac] said...

Ah yes, the culture of success.

You know what would really suck? Being the pastor of the 2nd largest church in America. Or maybe like, the 5th or 6th largest. So close you can taste that #1 spot, but you know you'll never get there.

Did the Great Gazoo make an appearence at the Loyal Order of Buffalo dinner?